Conversation is an interesting phenomenon. It only really has two manifestations. There are conversations that fill time. These can be either exciting, or less than exciting. And then there are the conversations that stimulate thought. While the former is more common, (overwhelmingly so) the latter is of far greater value. Now, I am not saying that there is no place in this world for trivial conversation. Quite contrary to that, I believe that trivial conversation is a vital part of the glue that holds society together, and simultaneously it is the grease that keeps the world running smoothly. Without these meaningless exchanges, it would be much harder to foster good feeling and interactions between strangers would become a burden to be avoided at all costs. So, I believe that trivial uses of the English language are an important part of cultural and societal communication.
But there is another form of communication. That form which originates in thought and conveys between individuals ideas and beliefs of import. This brand of conversation has a purpose wholly different, and equally as important as the more trivial form. While the lighter conversations serve dually as glue and grease, the deeper, heavier verbal exchanges serve as an individual stimulus to growth. These conversations originate in the deeper thinking parts of the psyche and penetrate the shallow shell of the social mind to whatever part of the brain contains the individual. More often than not, these intellectual or spiritual conversations require the mind to engage in effort, just to understand the ideas, and cause the engaged mind to reflect inwardly about itself.
I have had three of these conversations in the last two days, and can honestly say that I feel better about myself as a person because of them. I had the rare, and coveted opportunity to spend an hour with my friend Susanna. While I wouldn't say we plumbed the depths of philosophical post-modernism, I wouldn't say we wasted our words. Of course, some of the time we indulged in the enjoyment of the trivial, but we also made the effort to talk about things that mattered. Our time was short, and after she had to leave, I chose to visit the house of some friends whose spirit always cheers me. My time with Sarah and Shena was used less for intellectual exchange, but I feel it was no less meaningful, if only because the spirit they carry with them seemed to lend its import to the conversation.
Tonight, however, was the conversation that sparked the whole process of my thinking about this. I spent the evening conversing with my friend Matt Spear. We talked for upwards of two hours, and I don't believe that any of it was wasted. Every part of the conversation was in some way used to share a personal belief or discuss an idea between the two of us. And here I am able to present an evidence for the growth I spoke of earlier. In the course of our conversation, I realized something about myself that I hope I will be able to develop to my benefit. We were discussing the differences twixt the way Matt receives guidance from the Holy Ghost, and the way his dad learns. Of course, the conversation came back to me, and I realized, for the first time ever, that the Lord has attempted to establish a method of communication with me. I realized that the only way I ever remember having received revelation is through writing. I say writing, but I mean the verbal (vocal or written) expression of whatever idea is in my head. I have received guidance numerous times when simply writing my thoughts during a church meeting. Or absently streaming my mind onto paper during a slow day of work or class. Elder Scott, of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said in a talk at the MTC, "When you write things down, you authorize the spirit to give you more." I personally believe this to be especially true in my own life. And now that I have consciously realized it, I can develop it and begin to make use of it.
That is the type of growth that can come from meaningful conversation. Those are the conversations I would dub, real communication. I would urge you all to seek after this communication in your lives. I have known people to go months or years without ever actually communicating with anyone. I do not believe this is healthy. And so, I urge you again to find a time and person with whom you can communicate regularly. It will improve your quality of life.
