Just Assperimenting

I just want to see how this looks on my page, and see if it works. I did, however, make sure it is a wicked cool song for you to hear.

Sialorrhea

I'ma spit some words at you like a rapper with sialorrhea.

Google search for Thingzorz. I don't get it either.

You may or may not know me very well. So you may or may not know that I occasionally have problems with procrastination and overwhelm. I procrastinate the things until they have piled into a big mountain of THINGZORZ!!ARGH! and I am afraid to even touch it so I end up paralyzed with overwhelm and I do nothing and fail out of college.

This has understandably caused me some problems over the last 28 years (yes, even babies can procrastinate). I have struggled for some time to find a way to get things done and be effective in spite of these hurdles. And I believe I have found something that might have worked.

When I think about all that I need to do, my to-do list becomes an all consuming doom-beast and I end up cowering in fear. So, instead I absolutely refuse to think about the future. I exist now and only now. Just now. And then I pick something to do. Just one thing. I only have to do one thing. And then when I'm done with that, I relax a little. It is actually pretty nice. I'm never stressed, and I get things done. The only possible issue is that I occasionally let the relaxation sessions stretch out pretty long. But, every plan has a weakness and this one is pretty decent.

You know, there really wasn't any reason to share this with the world. But I thought it out while washing dishes this morning and I felt like writing. So, I got all sialorrhea on you guys and this is what happened.

Epitaph

Have you seen V for Vendetta? It is, after all, November 5. I imagine most of you have seen the film. Think now on the character V. And if you haven't seen the movie, think instead of Frodo or Boromir. Or, if you are unfamiliar with them, think of Batman and his battle with Gotham. If you are unfortunate enough to be ignorant of all of these, think of Nikola Tesla; a man who gave his life to science.

What do these men share in common? They are all men who accomplished. Mankind, as a whole, loves stories about men of their caliber. We love the idea of these characters. For myself, I find the concept of characters like this so fascinating that I read their story whenever I find it. What is it about these men that grabs our interest? What is it about these characters that pulls us into their story and compels us to care about them? I do not know you, so I cannot speak for you. But I can speak for myself. And so I will.

These men, these characters and their lives, are defined in my head by the same qualities. These lives that I read about are lives of purpose. They are lives of accomplishment. And they aren't just accomplishments of convenience. The stories that grip me are the stories of characters who pursue their goals with unwavering determination. They are the stories characterized by ambition and drive. By goals. By vision.

These are men who have thought long and hard about life and about the world in which they live. These are men who color their existence with vibrant hues of passion. Right or wrong, these men have determined exactly where they are going. Right or wrong, these men care so deeply, and believe so strongly, that they are willing to sacrifice everything in pursuit of their goal.

These are the qualities that I find so compelling. And I find them compelling because they are everything that I am not. They are everything that I wish to be. Where they have drive, I am lost. Where they have passion, I am listless. Where they have vision, I am confused.

These men are wearing out their lives striving to build monuments to their ambition; seeking to shape the world to their vision.

I can't help but wonder...

...what will be written on my tombstone?